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In a Czechoslovakian tourist agency: Take one of our horse-driven city tours -- we guarantee no miscarriages.
(As seen in the Huntsville (Alabama) Times):
FOR SALE: Horse with tact.
From: email@example.com (Les Bartel)
....And You Thought YOU were Having a Bad Day!!!!!!!!
While motorcycling through the Hungarian countryside, Cristo Falatticame up to a railway border crossing, just as the crossing gates werecoming down. While he sat idling, he was joined by a farmer with a goat,which the farmer tethered to the crossing gate. A few moments later ahorse and cart drew up behind Falatti, followed in short order by a man in asports car. When the train roared through the crossing, the horse startled and bit Falatti on the arm. Not a man to be triffled with, Falattiresponded by punching the horse in the head. In consequence, the horse's owner jumped down from his cart and began scuffling with the motorcyclist. The horse, which was not up to this sort of excitement, backed away briskly,smashing the cart into the sports car. At this, the sports-car driver leaped out of his car and joined the fray. The farmer came forward to try to pacify the three flailing men. As he did so, the crossing gate rose and his goat was strangled. At last report, the insurance companieswere still trying to sort out the claims.
Quote from an actual news article: Great care must be exercised in tying horses to trees, as they are apt to bark.
(Article in Gold Coast Bulletin 1995):
Police short of horses. QUEENSLAND.
Police are seeking suitable horses to bolster its mounted unit, says officer-in-charge, Senior Sergeant Ian Johnston. A shortage of donated horses has prompted the unit to make a public appeal. Sen Sgt Johnston said the horses must be bay, black or brrown geldings, no less than 16 hands high. "It is desirable that the horses be thoroughbreds or of a warm blood type, have good temperaments, and be willing to serve the Queensland public," said Sen Sgt Johnston.
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