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The Cowboy Poem
The cowboy looked around his cozy home
upon the range,
And realized that lately he'd been seein' some things change.
But instead of getting better, certain
things were getting worse.
They sure weren't moving forward; they were going in reverse!
It was getting close to roundup time, and
he'd had a trying week,
So when something made him angry, he felt inclined to speak.
The final straw came as he was readying
And the actions of his wife had that cowboy seeing red.
He'd walked into the bedroom, and found
to his chagrin
His wife in her new nightie, rubbing Bag Balm on her skin.
He said, "Darlin', you know that I'm
not one for confrontation,
But I think it's time that you and I had a serious conversation!
I have tried hard to be patient, but this
is the last straw,
And you better pay attention, 'cause I'm laying down the law.
I'm realizing now I should have used my
The first time that I found that horse shampoo stuck inside our shower.
I guess I thought it'd end there; to that
I will fess up,
But the mane and tail conditioner was the next thing to show up.
Then came your daily ritual, the thought
of it still pales;
You sit down at the table and rub Hooflex on your nails.
And now, I see you sitting here, pretty
as you please
Slathering that Bag Balm on your hands and feet and knees.
You've got to cut this out now, or we're
headed for divorce!
Good gosh! You've got me feeling like I'm sleeping with my horse!
I'm sorry that I yelled. I didn't mean to
But I'm afraid that soon I'll find Clovite in my food!"
His wife just started laughing and
exclaimed, "Don't be a ninny!"
Then she hugged her cowboy husband, and gave a little whinny!
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